Vampires of the Velvet Lounge

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Vampires of the Velvet Lounge

Mar 2026

1h 45m

Comedy

Horror

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Tomatometer

Popcornmeter

29%

Tomatometer

14 Reviews

Popcornmeter

Fewer than 50 Ratings

Deep in the American South, a back alley absinthe bar harbors a deadly secret: Countess Elizabeth Báthory and her glamorous coven of vampires keep their killer instincts sharp by preying on lonely singles through dating apps, seducing and slaughtering to preserve their youth. But when Elizabeth swipes right on the wrong profiles--a cunning undercover vampire hunter and a band of emotionally stunted bros--the hunt spirals into hilariously horrifying chaos. Blood flies, fangs pierce flesh, and the bar erupts into a glitter-soaked, green fairy-winged, fang-filled fever dream of grindhouse gore, terrible decisions, and fashionably fatal carnage.

Simon Abrams

RogerEbert.com

5d

0.5/4

It often seems more like a filmed rehearsal for a movie than a fully completed feature

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Charles Johnston

Spectrum Culture

4d

This loathsome film is as if a Spirit Halloween store was a movie and barely qualifies as schlock entertainment.

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M. Faust

The Buffalo Hive

5d

1.5/4

[W]hy is this taking up valuable screen space in theaters when it clearly deserved to premiere on Tubi?

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Megan Loucks

InSession Film

5d

C

Fortunately, the film has a saving grace with Suvari, who matches the campiness required to make Sherman’s vampire flick worth sinking your teeth into.

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Sarah Vincent

Sarah G Vincent Views

6d

It is almost as if there was a dare to make a bad movie with a great to decent cast and God level vampires, and Sherman was determined to win.

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George and Josh Bate

ScreenAnarchy

Mar 20

2/5

You’ll probably experience a ‘better’ and scarier horror movie navigating dating apps than you will watching this poorly executed fusion of vampires and modern dating.

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Boomer7332

3d

One of the worst movies I've ever seen. Waste of time & money!

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zack

6d

Entertaining lower budged flick. Sexy vampires were a definite plus. Honestly my biggest complaint was some of the music selections. How you have a vampire movie trying to be sexy without some Deftones or something similar is beyond me

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William

3d

Slow the captions down, us old people don’t read that fast. The movie itself was assembled nicely. I guess they needed a narrator. I love the references to The Last Voyage of the Dimitri , that was cool! The change in the vampires power was different, than most vampires movies. All in all it’s easy watching, so be prepared for buckets of blood, and neck biting pleasure!

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Jack S

3d

This movie has everything I've been wanting to see for a shlocky horror film, glitz, glam, cool fashion, 80's saxophone, jazz music at times, batsh*t insane and fun and crazy, and gory. The actress who plays the Assasin has awful acting when she narrates and so is the dialogue, I also do think it is illogical and a incoherent mess but all of these issues didn't bother me so much tbh. The movie is a mix of 2000's horror movie on a Syfy Channel, shot like a CW drama, and has 80's saxophone at times, it's also so mixed up and random, I love it.

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Heather S

@Bombshell_Li 5d

Had high hopes based on the premise and the cast. The whole movie was just meh. Not funny. Very few action scenes.

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B P

@Bradster69 Mar 20

A Campy, Sometimes Clumsy Bloodsucking Romp

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Adam Sherman

Director

Mena Suvari

Actor

Dichen Lachman

Actor

Stephen Dorff

Actor

India Eisley

Actor

Lochlyn Munro

Actor

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Synopsis

Deep in the American South, a back alley absinthe bar harbors a deadly secret: Countess Elizabeth Báthory and her glamorous coven of vampires keep their killer instincts sharp by preying on lonely singles through dating apps, seducing and slaughtering to preserve their youth. But when Elizabeth swipes right on the wrong profiles--a cunning undercover vampire hunter and a band of emotionally stunted bros--the hunt spirals into hilariously horrifying chaos. Blood flies, fangs pierce flesh, and the bar erupts into a glitter-soaked, green fairy-winged, fang-filled fever dream of grindhouse gore, terrible decisions, and fashionably fatal carnage.

Director: Adam Sherman
Producer: Adam Sherman, Marcus Englefield, George Lee
Screenwriter: Adam Sherman
Distributor: Strand Releasing
Production Co: Adam Sherman Film, Storyoscopic Films
Genre: Comedy, Horror
Release Date (Theaters): Mar 20, 2026, Limited
Runtime: 1h 45m