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Michael Ordoña

Tomatometer-approved critic

Reviews

Movies TV Shows
Hamnet (2025) 86% EDIT “Hamnet is a technical, artistic, intellectual, and emotional feast. ” – TheWrap Dec 11, 2025 Full Review Five Nights at Freddy's 2 (2025) 16% EDIT “The script is the quintessence of lead. It lumbers from functional scene to functional scene at a golem’s pace with a dismissal of logic that borders on the contemptuous -- or the insane. ” – TheWrap Dec 4, 2025 Full Review Volcanoes: The Fires of Creation (2018) 3/5 EDIT “The cinematography's the thing in this kind of film, of course, and it doesn't disappoint, with impressive images previously unseen by most.” – Common Sense Media Nov 12, 2025 Full Review Pretty Outrageous (2017) 2/5 EDIT “Pretty Outrageous is very much in the style of Disney Channel and Nickelodeon movies: It's clean and generally conflict-free.” – Common Sense Media Nov 12, 2025 Full Review Die My Love (2025) 74% 2/4 EDIT “It's a slow-burn psychological drama populated by imperfect people struggling with painful realities. Instead of a dramatic arc, it's a dramatic decline. ” – San Francisco Chronicle Nov 3, 2025 Full Review Roofman (2025) 87% 3/4 EDIT ““Roofman” hooks viewers with its compelling depiction of a person too smart for his own good. It’s funny and moving, however close to or far from the real events it may be. ” – San Francisco Chronicle Oct 9, 2025 Full Review The Lost Bus (2025) 88% 2.5/4 EDIT “If one accepts this is a Hollywoodized fictionalization of real events and allows the filmmaking to take over, “The Lost Bus,” at its best, can be an exciting, engrossing trip.” – San Francisco Chronicle Sep 24, 2025 Full Review Spinal Tap II: The End Continues (2025) 65% EDIT “We’re here to visit with these guys again after 40 years. And for Heavy Duty Rock and Roll. And a kinder, gentler “Spinal Tap II: The End Continues” delivers enough to satisfy both demands.” – TheWrap Sep 11, 2025 Full Review The Long Walk (2025) 88% 2.5/4 EDIT ““The Long Walk” is a heartfelt metaphorical drama about people bonding under duress. Instead of focusing on the darker side of human nature one might expect from the average dystopian film, it finds power in small acts of connection. ” – San Francisco Chronicle Sep 10, 2025 Full Review Ne Zha II (2025) 91% 4/4 EDIT “The visuals are never less than inspired.” – San Francisco Chronicle Aug 20, 2025 Full Review Highest 2 Lowest (2025) 83% 2/4 EDIT “Washington’s performance lacks the gravitas the iconic actor usually provides.” – San Francisco Chronicle Aug 15, 2025 Full Review The Pickup (2025) 25% 1/4 EDIT “Oh, to live in a world such as that of “The Pickup,” where physics mean nothing and the arc of the universe bends toward justice, however improbable, as long as one can “learn weaponry and precision driving” and everything goes miraculously right.” – San Francisco Chronicle Aug 5, 2025 Full Review Happy Gilmore 2 (2025) 62% EDIT “There are laughs to be had, here and there; the good news is, the sequel isn’t terrible. It’s just not anything special, nothing with the spark of the original. ” – TheWrap Jul 30, 2025 Full Review Jurassic World Rebirth (2025) 50% 1/4 EDIT “This one is less of a slog, but there is precious little interesting or new in “Jurassic World Rebirth.” It’ll likely earn a billion dollars anyway.” – San Francisco Chronicle Jun 30, 2025 Full Review M3GAN 2.0 (2025) 57% EDIT “"M3GAN 2.0" wisely takes the franchise to a totally new place, and has a lot of fun doing so.” – TheWrap Jun 25, 2025 Full Review 28 Years Later (2025) 88% EDIT “Garland and Boyle have made a different film than the other two installments, and deserve credit for that. ” – San Francisco Chronicle Jun 18, 2025 Full Review F1 The Movie (2025) 82% 2.5/4 EDIT “Pitt’s screen presence has aged like a leather jacket, scuffed in all the right places and cooler than ever.” – San Francisco Chronicle Jun 17, 2025 Full Review How to Train Your Dragon (2025) 77% EDIT “The new film is at times a shot-for-shot remount, which feels more like fan service than artistic expression. ” – TheWrap Jun 10, 2025 Full Review Thunderbolts* (2025) 88% 3/4 EDIT “Directed by Berkeley native Jake Schreier, “Thunderbolts*’s” filmmaking is notably gritty (as in dirt under one’s nails), messy and real-feeling. And that’s good. ” – San Francisco Chronicle Apr 29, 2025 Full Review The Amateur (2025) 62% 3/4 EDIT “Charlie’s capacities are fascinating, but it’s his limitations, including a deeply wounded psyche, that make the film so much more interesting than the average genre piece.” – San Francisco Chronicle Apr 10, 2025 Full Review A Minecraft Movie (2025) 48% EDIT “The makers of the video game-based “A Minecraft Movie” know their built-in audience and ruthlessly target them with fan service and slapstick galore. For the rest of us, it’s a by-the-numbers Hero’s Journey amid colorful digital backgrounds. ” – TheWrap Apr 2, 2025 Full Review Warfare (2025) 92% EDIT “Perhaps the most effective way to convey that war is hell is to dump all the metaphors, story beats and shoehorned character development and just put the viewer in it, which this film accomplishes in a way very rarely seen in narrative cinema. ” – TheWrap Apr 1, 2025 Full Review A Working Man (2025) 47% EDIT “Ben Greaves’ sound mixing is notable. Shawn White’s cinematography is of a higher grade than one usually sees in the genre, working with production designer Nigel Evans to generate some memorable images and textures. ” – TheWrap Apr 1, 2025 Full Review Radium Girls (2018) 74% EDIT “Little attention is paid to the vernacular or physicality of the period. The depths of emotions aren’t plumbed...” – Los Angeles Times Mar 7, 2025 Full Review Nickel Boys (2024) 92% 3/4 EDIT ““Nickel Boys” offers a different way to understand horrors based on true events not that far in the past by plunging viewers into its characters’ humanity.” – San Francisco Chronicle Jan 15, 2025 Full Review
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